When choosing a minister or officiant for your wedding, you need to show up to the first meeting with a few questions for him or her. In fact, you may want some of those questions answered before you even take time to chat face to face. Of my many years of meeting with couples as an Arizona ordained minister, the following questions, I think, were some of the best:
- Are you a “real pastor” at a church? If so, which one?
- How long have you been a wedding minister? How long have you been a minister in a church?
- Do you require premarital counseling?
- Do you offer premarital counseling? If so, what kinds of things should we expect in our meetings with you? How much do those meetings cost?
- How many times would you like to meet with us before the wedding day?
- Is it a problem that our faith is different than yours?
- Are you open to our ideas with the wedding ceremony?
- How long will the entire ceremony be?
- What can we expect if you get sick and cannot be at our wedding? What is your back up plan?
- What will you wear at our ceremony? A robe or a suit?
Those are a few of the better questions asked. Because you don’t get married often, it’s good to arrive at your meeting with your own questions so you can make a good decision about who you are going to invite to marry you both.
At the end of the day, the most important thing is chemistry. In other words, do you feel comfortable with him or her? Do you like him or her? Did he or she make you feel good and positive? The answers to those questions come from your heart. All the other questions are important, but when it comes down to it, you must be happy with the man or woman officiating your wedding.
– Rev. Randy Williams