The wedding pastor (or wedding minister or wedding officiant) is the one “vendor” who needs to be much more than a vendor to you and your partner. He or she is going to provide very personal advise for your marriage and stand with you while you exchange your most intimate vows to each other.
So with that said, here are the top ten things you need to look for in a wedding pastor:
- Kind and gracious
- Warm and nurturing
- Competent public speaker
- Experienced in wedding ceremonies
- A “real pastor” not an Internet ordained “minister”
- Successful in his or her own marriage
- Open to your ideas
- Has many of his or her own ideas for you to choose from
- Will not make the ceremony about him or her
- Will make time for you to discuss your marriage not just your wedding
My responsibility as the wedding pastor is to prepare the couple for the wedding ceremony and the marriage. It’s easy for the couple to forget or even neglect the attention needed for being married. Even if a couple is cohabiting before the wedding, they must be prepared for the fact that their relationship is going to change. For this reason, i never charge extra money for time spent with the couple to discuss their relationship. I want to remove all possible excuses to not meeting with me.
I have found that the majority of couples are not willing or able to give me more than one session. With that in mind, I try to convince them to take a personality test for me and give me an hour to go over the test together. Pound for pound, there’s nothing i can do more for them in one hour than provide insight from a test such as the Taylor Johnson Temp test. It’s cheap, easy, fast, and informative.
I love preparing couples for their wedding day. I enjoy even more preparing couples to last a lifetime together.