Renner is a communications professional and LGBTQ+ advocate. He lives in University Heights.
Over the past ten years, I’ve regularly painted my nails and as a bearded man standing at 6 feet, 2 inches tall, I suppose that’s something unique. One day, I hope it isn’t.
I’ve donned every shade, glitter tone, and have recently been obsessed with elaborate nail art. On my social media, I’ve made a point to post my manicures, my hairy knuckles, and big hands, a stark contrast to typically feminine hands you find under a nails of the day hashtag or #NOTD. For me, this started as a way of defying gender norms, but I’ve stuck with it because it truly gives me joy.
As of late, men painting their nails is in vogue, especially for straight male stars like Bad Bunny and Harry Styles. GQ recently published an article, “Jeremy Allen White Can Pull off a Manicure, and So Can You“. These men are lauded for their self-expression and flare, protected by their straight privilege.
Gay, queer and nonbinary people aren’t always afforded the same praise. So often in entertainment and popular culture, queer people did it first. We should recognize that there is a power dynamic that allows certain aspects of queer culture to be cheery-picked and popularized by the cisgender-heterosexual mainstream.
I started painting my nails when I worked at an LGBT Center in Santa Barbara, where I conducted LGBTQ+ cultural competency trainings for educators and social service providers. I’d explain the difference between gender identity, sexual orientation and gender expression. Having painted nails was an easy way to explain that I identify as a man, am attracted to men and that nail polish was part of my gender expression, which is typically deemed “feminine”.
For the most part, people responded positively to it, after all, I’m affable and carry enough White-passing, tall male privilege that a hint of femininity is generally non-threatening. Women would complement me on my color choices and on occasion, some men would whisper that they liked it too.
My mom didn’t love it at first. “Professional men just don’t wear nail polish,” she would remind me. I worked in a queer space so I knew I could express myself this way, and I figured that might not be possible in other jobs, so I knew I had to enjoy it while I could. It became my signature. My roommate at the time worked for a cosmetics company and would bring home new shades, so our collection grew and grew, eventually we had over 80 polishes.
I religiously wore nail polish from 2013 to 2015 and that really felt cutting edge. The tide for marriage equality was turning and transgender issues were coming up to the mainstream. I got to know more trans people in my community, I was constantly talking about gender politics, and at times, I questioned my own gender identity.
In my trainings, people asked questions, some respectful, many reductive and uncomfortable. What I saw and felt, in that community at least, was a general desire to understand. In many ways, talking about gender identity and expression felt safer then, it wasn’t as charged of a topic and conservatives hadn’t fully latched onto anti-trans rhetoric yet.
When I moved to San Diego, I had to feel out my new environment. When I started various jobs, I’d have to get comfortable before I started donning a manicure at work. When I worked for then-Councilmember Chris Ward in the San Diego City Council District 3 office, I waited a year before I showed up in a suit and painted nails. I didn’t want to be that new staffer to the gay elected official with painted nails; I wanted people to know me before they judged me and my fabulous mani.
Eventually, it just became part of who I am, and my current job affirms my nail polish and all parts of my identity. That too, shouldn’t be something unique.
When it comes to gender expression, I hope that people embrace what makes them feel good and I hope that other people can embrace that. Whatever your identity, wear nail polish, or don’t, you don’t need me, or GQ, or anyone else to give you permission.
FAQs
It gives me a sense of power, sexiness, elegance, and cleanliness. At family functions, children often approach me with curiosity, asking, 'Why do you paint your nails? ' My response is straightforward: 'Because it makes me feel good, and I like the way it looks. ' It's an accessory, much like jewelry.
Why do straight guys paint their nails? ›
They do it for self-expression.
Traditionally, accessories, hairstyles, and clothes have served this purpose, but polished nails can perfectly complement any man's look, and say a lot about his “true colors.” There are plenty of manicure styles that will match any outfit and persona.
Why do people like painting their nails? ›
Nail Polish Feels Good
When people paint their nails with nail polish, they often look and feel good. This is true because getting a manicure can be a form of self-care. When you make time to focus on you and your needs, it recharges you and lifts your spirits .
Why do people like nail art? ›
What's always been true is that our nails are a vehicle to express who we are or who we want to be. The 1950s saw the invention of the first acrylic sets. Two decades later, bold nails became a beloved form of cultural expression in Black and brown communities, long before they were ever spotted on a runway.
Why do I feel good after painting? ›
Painting allows for emotional release because it stimulates the creative side of your mind while focusing your attention in one place, which can lower anxiety. In this way, the creative outlet improves your mental health significantly.
Is painting your nails good for mental health? ›
Relieves Stress:
Painting your nails requires focus so your mind is directed to one thing. Helping you focus your energy onto your manicure. Slow steady brush strokes mirror the slow steady breaths you take while painting your nails. It is relaxing and helps you calm down.
Does nail polish turn guys on? ›
Yes, according to psychologists, color experts and, well, science. Red nails can be a magnet to attract male attention, but not necessarily for the reason the theory espouses.
What does one fingernail painted black mean? ›
If you see a man with a single painted nail, most often the ring finger, he is probably partaking in the Polished Man campaign. This campaign was started by Elliot Costello when he traveled to Cambodia and met a little girl named Thea. Thea recounted the sexual abuse she suffered.
Do men like painted nails? ›
Not only do men love wearing polish themselves, they love seeing a multitude of colors on other people. It is important to note that this is not true for every guy. Some guys may not be into wearing more than a clear gloss, but others may gravitate towards a bright nail polish.
Why do girls paint their nails white? ›
As you probably already know, the colour can symbolise cleanliness, freshness or a blank slate. But according to Urban Dictionary, white nails mean someone is "ready to move on to have a fresh start".
Nail design: Men like these colors
In a representative survey, the German Paint Institute found that men generally likeblue , but also likegray , black and brown . Both sexes like green about equally, while women are more likely to like red ,yellow ,beige and orange .
Is painting nails a skill? ›
Creating a perfectly structured and streamlined nail is in itself a difficult skill, and an art. It takes years of dedication, hard work and passion for someone to achieve this level of mastery in the craft of nails.
Do fingernails have a purpose? ›
The short answer is we have evolved to have nails because they help us pick things up (like food), pick things off (like bugs), and hold tightly onto things. Early humans who had these type of nails (instead of claws) tended to live long enough to have babies and pass on the fingernails gene to their kids.
Does having painted nails make you more attractive? ›
Red Nails Theory is a theory that suggests that men are more likely to be attracted to women with red nails. The theory has been backed up by research, which shows that men find women with red nails more attractive than those with any other color nails.
Why is nail painting considered feminine? ›
It is not exactly known when nail polish became associated strictly with femininity, but by the 1800s, Victorian era women were painting their nails to signify purity and cleanliness.
Why do I feel so good after getting my nails done? ›
Research has long shown that a trip to the manicurist results in feelings of relaxation and euphoria, and significantly reduces anxiety. Previous studies have suggested that these feel-good effects come from the mood-boosting brain chemicals that are released when we come into contact with human touch.
Why does it feel so good to pick my nails? ›
Sensory Stimulation: Some individuals engage in nail picking to seek sensory stimulation or to get rid of a sensation that feels different, such as a rough nail edge, a sharp feeling nail, or some other aberration that attracts the person to that area.
What nail color makes you happy? ›
Yellow = Energized. Ditch the negativity and take the first step to feeling joyful and optimistic by painting your nails bright, sunshiny yellow.
Why do I like nail polish so much? ›
Having good-looking nails (hair, skin, face) makes us feel good about ourselves. It makes us look fresh, pretty, and neat. It does not make us happy, but it brings us a certain amount of joy. Some go for it to be more attractive or to impress.
